Welcoming Madelyn into the world was the most bewildering, overwhelming, frightening, but WONDERFUL experience of my life. I have been so excited to write down her birth story, because I don't want to forget a moment. As with the pregnancy, labor and delivery was a roller coaster whirl wind that was unlike my vision - but isn't that how everything is in life. Nothing goes according to the plan...
our plan, that is.
Last Tuesday morning I woke up, feeling great. I ran a ton of errands, such as getting my hair done (a necessity before giving birth!), picking up some last minute things from the store, ordering our stroller from Babies R' Us, and coming home to organize our linen closet and shampoo all the carpets upstairs. It was a productive day.
For dinner we enjoyed a wonderful meal at a restaurant up the road. We had fried pickles and my mom joked that my water was going to break. I informed her that "only 13% of women's water actually break", and that certainly would not happen to me - I was for sure! Billy hugged my parents goodbye and jokingly teased that he would call them after the birth of our baby was said and done. We got in the car and drove home.
As I was getting ready for bed, I bent down to feed Sophie some food and felt a strange, small gush. I couldn't be sure, but I knew something had happened that wasn't otherwise normal. I went upstairs and told Billy tentatively, "I think my water just broke". Billy, who was by this time snug as a bug in the bed, looked at me with skepticism.
Over the next half hour, I paced around the bedroom, beginning to stuff some last minute belongings in the hospital bags that had been packed and ready to go for the last month. I had envisioned this moment for months, and couldn't believe it was actually happening this way.
After calling the hospital, I jumped in the shower while Billy packed his bag. He needed several prompts to actually get out of bed and get going. I think he was in disbelief that this was happening as well. Billy called my parents to inform them of the news, and of course, based on the last comment made to my parents just a short time ago at the restaurant, they didn't believe him.
After a lot of running around the house to gather odds and ends, we finally packed the bags to head for the hospital. Other than my water breaking, I had no signs of labor. After checking into our room, we spoke with the nurse and decided to begin walking the hallways to try and bring on some contractions. After about an hour of walking, we thought it best to go ahead and turn in for the night to prepare for the busy day ahead of us. When I was finally hooked up to the monitors and had taken a test that determined that my water had in fact broken, it was 2:00 in the morning. Billy made his bed on the couch and I tried my best to sleep, but it was a futile effort. We were going to meet my daughter in the morning! We were both so excited! (But we still had some anxiety - just look at Billy's face on the drive over!)
When the morning rolled around, my contractions had not picked up at all, I was still about 2 and a half centimeters dilated, and we could tell labor would progress slowly. A new nurse arrived and informed us that the previous nurse had not documented the test she gave that confirmed that my water had broken. Therefore, my doctor arrived to give some more tests to see if my water had in fact broken, because they needed to be certain before administering Pitocin, which would help speed the process.
After two tests that were inconclusive (one was positive and one was negative), and an ultrasound to measure the amniotic sac fluid levels (the fluid levels were on the low side of normal), one of the tests finally came back positive, proving that my water in fact had broken. (I knew I wasn't crazy!)
Now that the doctor and nurses knew my water had broken, they could begin a Pitocin IV to speed the labor along. I wasn't thrilled about starting Pitocin, because my ideal labor would have involved my contractions progressing naturally, but I also knew that since my water had broken, the chances of infection were increased and I needed to deliver the baby within 24 hours. I knew that my other option was waiting and increasing my risk for a Cesarean - which I most certainly wanted to avoid.
So, they began administering Pitocin at increasing levels every 30 minutes and checking the progress of my contractions. I steadied myself for the contractions to come on hard and strong - but they never did. After six hours on the Pitocin, my contractions were still mild and I was able to read, laugh, watch tv, and talk through the contractions. I foolishly though to myself, "Hey, this isn't so bad, I must have a high pain tolerance." The nurses were surprised to find me still relaxed as well.
I finally reached the maximum level of Pitocin I could take before they needed to insert an internal monitor. Before they did; however, my doctor stopped in and explained she didn't think I was acting like my water had broken. I couldn't believe we were back to questioning this fact. She explained that sometimes, you can have a leak in the amniotic sac, but the water won't be broken all the way. Therefore, my doctor once and for all ruptured the amniotic sac. I was 4 centimeters dilated.
Once my water was fully broken (once and for all!), labor truly started moving along. Five minutes hadn't passed before I finally felt the full force of the contractions. Like a light switch my labor took a turn towards the painful side. I immediately began thinking about the "e" word. The nurses had warned me in the beginning not to be a hero and ask for the epidural when I needed it. They also warned that it would take about an hour to actually get the medicine once I had asked for it. After a short time, I knew I didn't want to wait too much longer to ask for the anesthesiologist, and I started getting emotional. It had been a long day, but I didn't want to be a "wimp" and ask for the epidural too soon.
By the time the anesthesiologist arrived; however, I didn't care whether I was a wuss or not. I was ready to stop feeling those contractions. I have so much respect for those who give birth au natural! After the epidural, labor began to progress quickly, but I was so fortunate to be more relaxed and comfortable.
After the epidural, the doctor inserted an internal monitor to track the intensity and frequency of my contractions. To their surprise, the contractions seemed "puny" and "weak". At this rate, they warned me that a Cesarean might be in my future if labor was going to progress this slowly. I was devastated, because, despite the epidural, these certainly did not feel like "puny" contractions to me! I was expecting some pressure with the epidural, but I was still feeling continuous pain. The doctor explained that our goal was for me to dilate 1 centimeter per hour in order to have a vaginal delivery.
The internal monitor still seemed to baffle the doctor and nurses who were monitoring my labor. They just did not understand why the contractions were so weak. Furthermore, the contractions were very close together, which was a result of all the Pitocin that had been administered. This was not optimal because it was wearing out the uterus.The nurses began to decrease my Pitocin levels.
After some time, the doctor decided to check my progress. To their surprise, I was 7 centimeters already, in a very short amount of time. The internal monitor was not working properly, and was therefore not a good indication of my contractions, which were worsening by the moment! After changing the monitor, I began to feel nervous, because I knew the end was coming...coming fast -- and I could feel it. The anesthesiologist explained that sometimes, when labor progresses so quickly, the epidural is not able to keep up. The nurse said she wanted me to "feel the pain", so I could push. I DID NOT want to feel the pain - I could feel it so much already - so the anesthesiologist gave me a small dose more to "take the edge off". Thank God!
Very soon afterwards, it was already time to push. The 12:30-1:00 a.m. birth time estimate was quickly changing to much sooner. Although it was getting close to the 24 hour mark, I couldn't believe this moment was approaching. I was so nervous to push, but in the end, you do what you gotta do, and I knew I just had to see my baby - it was time! After 45 minutes of pushing, Madelyn entered the world at 10:49 p.m. I was so overjoyed to finally meet her.
After delivery, we had some slight issues with my bleeding and Madelyn's breathing which added some tension to the room. However, after some quick treatment and "skin to skin" time with Madelyn, both issues were resolved and we were able to enjoy our first hour together as a family.
I can't believe it's already been a week since Madelyn joined our family. As I've heard many other mothers and fathers describe, the love you feel is indescribable. I find myself staring at her in awe - she's so perfect, a gift from God. It's still surreal to look at her and know that she is a product of Billy and I - she is ours. I feel blessed to have her, and what's more - blessed to have the loving and supportive family, friends, and husband that have made her transition into the world a joyful and seamless one. I have so much enjoyed the time spent with family and friends as they shower her with love. I know she will be blessed her whole life because of all the wonderful people we have in our lives.
