The day we found out about baby #2!

AHHH! I've been a neglectful mother, and haven't written much (if anything!) on the blog about our tiniest new arrival - baby #2. While I've been trying to enjoy every moment I spend with Miss M, go back to school (in a new grade), try my best to keep the house out of a disaster zone (HA), and just manage to stay awake past 8:00, it's been hard to get everything accomplished that I would like. (I won't even begin to pretend that I've been cooking dinner on nightly basis). Doesn't every one feel that way!?

BUT, I thought it'd be fun if I wrote up a little blurb about the day we found out we'd be adding a new addition to our family - mainly for my own memory as I try to begin to put together a pregnancy book like I did with Miss M. It will be different, for sure - because I haven't been able to do the weekly updates - but I want to at least include important milestones in the journey. 

So,  for a few weeks, I had been feeling more emotional than usual, more tired than usual, and more hungry than usual. (I know, I know - I'm always emotional, tired, and hungry - but this was extreme!)

One day in May, on the way home from seeing Butterflies LIVE at Lewis Ginter, I was so exhausted, I could barely keep my eyes open to get home. Often times, when seeing my bed, I would feel an OVERWHELMING urge to just crawl right in and sleeeeeep. I was starting to feel like naps were a necessity for me just to get through the day. (And let's face it - naps are not really a luxury a mother of a 9 month old can afford.) On one particular night, I was so knocked out that Mr. B walked in and I was drooling all over the couch, and he muttered, "You're not pregnant, are you?" I suppose exhaustion is just one of those early tell-tale signs for me.

 

I found myself starving often - even after forcing myself to eat high protein foods. With Miss M, I never noticed a difference in my hunger level. But, with baby #2, I found myself feeling as if my stomach was eating itself with a starving hunger that actually physically hurt. I'm not proud of this, but one day, I was so hungry while on my way to my parent's house (for lunch!) that I had to stop off on the way and grab a kids corndog. Thank goodness that only lasted for a week or two! Then, at a family get together, I felt queasy at the thought of eating a slice of tomato pie - which I LOVE, and had actually made myself, because I LOVE it. Weird. My sis in law jokingly remarked at the table, "Do you have something to tell us?!"

All these things should have been signs for me - DUH. But it wasn't until one particular day, when I couldn't drag myself out of bed while Miss M was napping, and I was starving but couldn't bring myself to munch on anything other than plain crackers, that I loaded her up in the car and drove to the store to grab a few tests. 

I eagerly took the tests as soon as we arrived home, and sure enough - it was a done deal! Baby #2 would definitely be joining our family. I was instantly overcome with a multitude of emotions. Happiness, joy, confusion, disbelief, and a surprising reaction of sadness. Don't get me wrong - I see every baby as a true blessing and joy, and I was so happy at this news. But, I had tinges of sadness because I felt guilty for taking away time from Miss M - barely 9 months at the time. I didn't want to take any of her baby time away - from her or us. I wanted to enjoy her and lavish her with our undivided attention for just a little while longer. It took a few weeks, but eventually I began to get over my guilty feelings of adding to our family, and I started seeing it as a wonderful opportunity for Miss M to experience the joys of having a sibling, which we knew we always wanted, we just hadn't planned on it happening so soon.

When Mr. B got home that night, I couldn't wait to tell him the wonderful news. Miss M was rolling around on the floor in the middle of all her toys (still not crawling), and we were enjoying watching her cuteness. As Billy gazed down at her from the couch, I casually asked, "So, do you want another one?" "Of course", he replied. "How about in nine months?" I responded, looking him in the eyes to see his reaction. The realization of what I was implying took a minute, and at first all he could say in an unsure, trembling voice was, "No...." as if in disbelief. "Yep." I matter of factly stated. He was so much in disbelief, he made me go upstairs and show him the pregnancy test right then and there. 

I know from there, his head immediately began spinning, as it does when you realize for the second time that your life will never, ever be the same - but in the most blessed and beautiful way.